COVID-19
Returning to School after Lockdown
Introduction
For many young people going back to school may be an added source of anxiety in already uncertain times. There are many reasons why returning to school may feel difficult right now and young people may experience a range of emotions including anxiety, worry, sadness, irritability and fear. It can be hard to just recognise one thing contributing to these feelings and there are likely a number of factors. Some of these may include:
They may feel overwhelmed by all that is happening in the world, tentative or unsure about what to expect, or a more general feeling of anxiety or fear.
They may feel settled at home or more comfortable, in control and safe with people at home rather than in the school environment.
Being at home may have relieved some of the pressures of the school environment that they find difficult; e.g. difficulties with learning, relationships with peers.
Having spent a significant period of time at home with parents/carers may mean young people are fearful of leaving their family.
They may be fearful of catching Coronavirus or feel worried about their friends and families.
Some of these feelings may be made worse by pre-existing difficulties, such as health conditions that make them more at risk, previous experiences of illness, certain mental health conditions (e.g. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder if it relates to fear of contamination).
For young people on the Autism Spectrum, anxiety may be increased by difficulties with change or transition, not being able to predict or imagine what the new version of school might look like, not knowing who will be in the class, possibility of not having access to some of the resources that support them and sensory sensitivities (for example, the feeling or smell of face coverings/masks/hand sanitiser).
How to help:
Firstly, taking the time to understand the anxiety and thinking how to support those feelings can help us to know how to respond to them. It might be that the young person is not able to say exactly what is worrying them.
Talk and listen to the feelings. Normalise and validate that it’s not surprising that young people would feel worried during these times. Anxiety is a normal response to feeling threat or danger which can be heightened during a pandemic. Try to balance normalising these worries with thinking of ways to support them to move forward. For some people they may feel more comfortable to speak by text, to write things down or use creative methods to express themselves.
To increase feelings of predictability and security, prepare young people as much as possible for what the school day might look like. This might be something you need to support them with by talking to school and making plans. Or you might encourage them to have a look for themselves on the school website, to walk past school to look at what it is like (if safe to do so), arrange with a teacher to talk about what will happen when they get to school and how they can seek support. When they are ready to get back to school, take practical steps to increase the likelihood of things running smoothly (e.g. making sure clothes and things they need are ready).
When everything feels like it has changed, whilst acknowledging what has changed, think together with the young person what has stayed the same to help to balance these worries. It might also help to think about some of the positives of going back to school (e.g., what are they looking forward to, what can they do that they have been missing). Whilst some things will be out of their control, try to think together about what things they can have control of in their day.
Signs that a young person is struggling:
You may be able to discuss the feelings together but where this is not possible, a few things to look out for include:
Panic type symptoms such as physical symptoms like nausea, feeling tense or shaky, headaches, dizziness, stomach ache, poor sleep.
Behaviours including avoiding doing things school related, going out or talking about school, refusing to go to school, checking for information online about Coronavirus or school excessively, seeking a lot of reassurance or asking a lot of questions, not finding pleasure in things they would usually enjoy.
Feelings of fear and anxiety will settle more easily if people are exposed to them gradually in a way that helps them feel secure. For example, if the anxiety is about separating from parents/carers, gradually start to practice separating and increase the amount of time you are away from them in the weeks leading up to going back to school so they can see that they will be ok, that you will come back and that you will still be safe and they will still be safe. Agree this plan together and be clear on when you are going out and when you will return. It might be helpful to start to do some other ‘normal’ daily activities to get back into some routines where this is safe and possible. This may be something as simple as starting to go out again in the car.
Help your young person to understand how anxiety works – i.e. that even if they feel worried, this will settle down and it will get easier each time they go to school. The first few times they are exposed to the fears by going to school will likely be the hardest. The more times they try, the easier it will become. Everyone is different with how long this will take to settle dependent on their circumstances and what the anxiety is about. Encourage your young person to notice their thoughts or feelings without acting on them in a way to try to control them. Reassure them that they will pass.
When they are going back to school, be supportive and reassuring but don’t spend too long saying goodbye in order to allow their anxiety to build up.
Your young person may not be able to take any objects into school due to COVID-19 guidelines, but they may take comfort in having some reminder of home such as an item of parents clothing like a hair bobble or a certain smell on their clothes.
Make a clear plan that can help if they do feel too anxious when in school. Try not to encourage this to be instantly coming home as this will reinforce the feeling that they were only safe because they came home. The plan might include trying different options such as speaking to somebody at school, practising deep breathing, allowing the feelings to pass or using some relaxation or grounding techniques. One example of a grounding technique to use if feeling overwhelmed is paying attention to the senses to ‘bring themselves back’ to the present moment (paying attention to what they can see, smell, touch, hear etc). Create this plan together to support them to feel more in control.
Help them to understand, if things don’t go perfectly initially (if they panic, if they can’t go in, if their day does need to be shorter, if they feel upset), that’s ok. Praise the efforts they made, not whether they have done it well. It will take time to adjust to getting back to school but if they keep gradually persevering with it, they will get there.
Be aware that initially, your young person may have found the school day very hard and may need to do something enjoyable or relaxing at the end of the school day.
Set aside a time each day before returning to school or once they have started back at school to talk about worries (not close to bedtime). Try to help the young person problem solve any specific worries and talk these though to encourage them to think about these from a more balanced perspective (not ignoring the worries, but also focusing on what might go well). Work through worries together to make plans for how to respond to things they can control and to support them to allow other worries to pass. The worry tree can help to break worries down into more manageable chunks. Then once this ‘worry time’ is finished, move onto talking about other topics or doing something else so school is not the main focus of every conversation.
Improving overall wellbeing:
Try to encourage your young person to get into a good sleep routine in the weeks leading up to returning to school. This may include things like, setting a time to turn off all devices before bed, doing something relaxing before bed, limiting caffeine. More information about helpful sleep routines can be found on The Children’s Sleep Charity website.
Encourage them to get some exercise. There are lots of free workouts on You Tube, e.g. Joe Wicks, Popsugar Fitness, Yoga for Teens with Adriene or this may going for walks or runs outside (if able to maintain social distancing).
Think together of the things they enjoy doing and think about how to incorporate something nice and uplifting to do each day. For example, singing along to music, watching a funny film or programme, sensory activities, drawing and painting, playing a game, building or making something, listening to podcasts, playing instruments, playing with or walking their pet, painting nails, doing an at home ‘spa day’, baking….
Extra sources of support
Initially, discuss individual needs and make plans for your young person’s return directly with their school. Referral options within school include the special educational needs coordinator (SENCO), pastoral support and family support teams who can develop individualised support options and refer on to additional services if needed.
In addition:
This social story explains what school might look like and is designed to help young people to understand what it means to be in a ‘protective bubble.
Kooth provides anonymous online mental health support for young people aged 11-25
Qwell provides free online support for parents
Build Sound Minds provides a range of support options for young people aged 0-17 who are experiencing mild to moderate mental health difficulties
This document gives some common reasons why young people on the Autism Spectrum may experience anxiety about attending school
Please also see our pages for further support and contacts